Verse 57 Rasodgāra līlā

रसोद्गार लीला

(Remembering the previous night's pastimes)

Verse 57
"Meanwhile, still weary from the precious night and staggering in their gait, Lalita and the other sakhis come one by one to assemble beside Radha.Rasa-tarangini Tika:

Nearly every day at this time, Radha joins her sakhis to relish over again the rasa of her previous night's affairs with Krishna. Many Gaudiya Mahajanas have written padavali kirtan padas on this theme. Sri Vishwanath Chakravarti depicts this pastime as follows in Krishna-bhavanamrita:

As Radha sits on a large jeweled vedi and rests against three large pillows, the sakhis surround her. They have just begun to laugh and engage in rasamaya banter, when Shyamala Sakhi arrives. Shyamala is a yutheshwari who leads her own group of sakhis. Nevertheless, she has a deep affection for Radha and enjoys more pleasure from hearing about Radha's affairs with Krishna than experiencing her own.

Thus seeing Shyamala approaching, Radha affectionately comes forward to embrace her and seats her by her side. Aho! Has loveliness personified just embraced Shyamala?
Then with intense anuraga, Radha forgets her previous night's episode, and exclaims, "Oh Shyamala! I was just thinking about you! If Krishna came before my eyes as you have, the tree of my desire would bear fruit. That would make my day auspicious! But, oh sundari Shyamale! Even as this tree continues to grow, and even though the sakhis continue to sprinkle water over it, it remains fruitless! Oh, what can be the reason, and when shall I rejoice to see its delectable fruits?"

"Oh sakhi Radhe!" answers smiling Shyamala. "If the tree of your desire hasn't fructified, don't worry-it will soon! Hey jaded one! Those fruits are certainly exotic because their fragrance maddens every ali! (bees like Vraja-gopis) For after tasting, they consider themselves deprived! Oh Rai, their redness has reddened your eyes- yet you deny seeing! Isn't this amazing, oh restless-eyed one? By savoring this amrita phala (nectarean fruit) again and again, your lips became bruised! Yet you deny it, which is astonishing!"

Thus Shyamala concludes: "And moreover, Rai! Krishna's red pan stains tint your eyelids, and his lips have discolored yours! So, has the incredible spell of Shyama anuraga made you forget everything?" 

Radhika replies, "Sakhi Shyamale! Don't misjudge my pain, hear and stop teasing me! After recollection, I guess that Krishna has touched me, but listen to my view: Just as a lightning flash suddenly illumines the sky on a dark, cloudy night and disappears leaving a darkness that is twice as dense, Krishna has entered my dark, cloudy life only once, like a flash, and then he suddenly vanished! So now my depression had doubled!"

Shyamala answers, "Radhe! The one you describe to be like lightning, that Kalanidhi (the moon or the bestower of kalankas, i.e., humiliating disgrace) has incessantly bathed you in the happiness of his karāgra, (moon beams, or fingernails) and those marks are visible on your breasts!"

Radha replies, "Oh Shyamale! You are right, sakhi, he's a kala-nidhi alright, although he didn't bestow any kalas (merits) upon me; rather, through his sanga, I've become a kalankini (an object of scandal)! Oh Shyamale! Hay! Hay! If just once he would bathe my chakora eyes in the moonbeams of his effulgence- not completely, just a little bit- not to the extent that all of my senses were submerged in his ambrosia, but just enough that my eyes were satiated-that would be sufficient! But alas, he's indifferent!"

Shyamala says, "O Radhe! Please don't deceive me! Oh sakhi, I've come to relieve all of my suffering! I want to enter the kathamrita Ganges of your previous night's Krishna-Sanga (association)! Rai, can a sadachari function without taking an early morning bath? Similarly, without bathing in the Ganga-like lilamrita flowing from your mouth, I'm unable to start my day!"Hearing Shyamala's prayer, Radha's intense Krishna anuraga deepens, and she continues to compare Krishna with a Kalanidhi: 

"Hey Shyamale! When I entered the nikunja mandir, suddenly a bright shyama effulgence overwhelmed me! Then, who placed me on the stage of Kamadeva's theater, I cannot say! And thereupon I was pelted from head to foot by an array of amorous flower arrows! Yet, as I watched the incredible dance of Vrindavan's Navina-Madana, he expanded unlimitedly, and I was completely devoured! Therefore, what happened? I am unable to say, even at the cost of my life!"Shyamala answers, "Hey Radhe! Although Krishna's dance within the vilasa sindhu causes a million Cupids to faint. You're the puppeteer who manipulates his movements! So how can you claim to be only a spectator. This is a white lie!" 

Radhika continues: "Shyamala! Besides these, there are hundreds of other impressions arising in my mind. But, oh sakhi! is this all a dream, or imagination, or the magic of Krishna's illusory potency? I cannot fathom it; my mind is totally confused! Even if a hungry person dreams of feasting while he is asleep, upon awakening his hunger remains. Similarly, the reflections of Krishna's anga sanga rising within my mind appear like dreams, so I am unable to tangibly relish them! Therefore, what's the use of mentioning all this phantasmagoria?"

Hearing Radha's dilemma, Shyamala concludes with a smile: "O Radhe! Even from a distance, the scent of Krishna's lips makes the Vraja sundaris blind to family obligation. As you've eagerly drunk that sweet madhu to excess, distortion of memory of inevitable. But this is not a dream, nor is it a display of magic!" (Krishna-bhavanmrita, 3.18-31)